How Are You Being Made Perfect?

 

I often say God gave me curly hair to remind me every morning how little control I really have in life.

 

I love my curly hair, I really do.  I just want it to curl perfectly the same on both sides.  Is that asking for too much?  Yep, yep it is.  (So I decided if I make both sides of my hair different it wouldn’t bug me so much and I love it this way.}

I like my eyeliner to be perfect too.  Oh, and the fit of my clothes and the style of my jewelry with each outfit.

 

Perfect, that’s how I like it.

 

How do you define perfect?

When we really stop and think about it perfect is very subjective.  Your idea of perfect and my idea of perfect are not the same.

In fact, my husband would say that my hair looks exactly the same every day.  I’m sure he would think it is styled it perfectly each day.  For me most days it is just as good as it is going to get.

Perfect is an interesting word, it can be used as a noun, verb or adjective.  Perfect as a verb is an act of making something free from faults and defects, or as close to such a condition as possible while the adjective has two meanings having all the desirable elements, qualities, and characteristics, as good as it is able to be or absolute, complete.  (per the online dictionary)

I don’t know about you, but I was surprised to see in the definition any reference to as good or as close as it can get.  In my mind, things are either perfect (flawless) or they are not.  I’m settling when I am accepting something that is as close as possible.

 

There is a very fine line between trying our best and being a perfectionist. 

 

Because perfection is subjective, I dare to say most of us struggle with perfectionism more than we realize.  Listening to our self-talk will probably help us to identify how real the struggle is for us.

Some woman dress perfectly each day and still aren’t happy with how they look.  Criticizing their reflection in the mirror every time they see it.

Some keep a spotless house but still worry that others are judging how long it has been since they have washed the windows.

Others avoid talking about family because they don’t want others to realize how heartbroken they are over a parodical child or addicted sibling.

The search for perfection is a discouraging and pointless pursuit.

 

The best news is the Lord actually took care of our greatest need per Hebrews 10:14

For by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy. 

(The Message)

 

I’m so thankful He is making me holy through His sacrifice.  It is a process for sure though. 

 

 

When we invite the Lord into our areas of perfectionism He helps us see things differently.

When looking in the mirror we see a beautiful woman created in His image with unique and special physical features.

When looking around her home she sees the blessing of the roof over here head, the people he has placed in her family, and the many special memories created there.

When thinking of your wayward loved one you remember to lift them up in prayer and ask your friends to join you in praying.

In what ways is the Lord perfecting you in this area of perfectionism?

 

Join me in next months Book Chat and Facebook Community as we explore Kathi and Cheri's book and how we can stop trying harder and start living braver.

Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory wrote a book called The Cure for the Perfect Life where they examine what Try-Harder Living has done to rob us of our joy and made nothing in life quite good enough.  They point out that there are 4 bullies that are the main culprits:  Perfectionism, People-Pleasing, Performancism and Procrastination.

Review by Rayna: How’s Your Soul?

Review by Rayna: How’s Your Soul?

 

How’s your soul? Is a question most of us avoid not Judah Smith.  In fact, he asks his friends this often and this book is a book about how he explored the answer to this question for himself.

The book challenges you to look deep.  Even though vulnerability is scary and it feels much saver to be superficial and not allow others to see if you are really OK on the inside.  Outward indicators are usually how we judge how things are going in our life but success is not how we know if we are OK on the inside.

To examine if you are satisfied, stable and healthy to determine how your soul is doing.

Our health and wellness moves from the inside out.  Most of the time when we struggle with inner peace we double down on the work on the outside, sadly that doesn’t bring peace.  You can’t make all the outside things go the way you want and you can’t escape what is not going well.

Our souls must learn to lean on and into God, the giver of our souls.

Relating to God from a place of forgiveness and acceptance from Jesus helps us find deeper fulfillment in God on a soul level will change everything.

Jonah challenges us to find a nurturing environment as God created it for us in the beginning.  A place of rest, responsibility, restraint and relationships rooted in God only.  He takes a closer look at each of this things in the light of God’s design for us.

One of the most powerful parts of this book for me was when Jonah examined how we often deal with emotions today.  Most of us allow our emotions to rule our world.  We have even gotten to a place that if we feel something is true then decide it must be.  Facts are evaluated in the light of our feelings.

Fulfillment, peace, joy, health on the inside, are often found by doing the exact opposite of what we feel like doing in the moment.  Our feelings can’t rule our lives.  How much different would your life be today if you were to step out of the place where you trust your feelings so much?

Another section that spoke to me was about control.  “We all struggle with viewing ourselves as god of our own lives.”  My first reaction was probably like yours, no way.  But Jonah goes on to say we have responsibilities but we are not in charge of our own fates.  You can’t live like it is all up to you.  If you do you are being a god of your life.  If you want a calm quiet soul you have to recognize, I am not in control.  The Lord has your best interest in mind.  “External control does not give us inner peace.”  God has both external control and the ability to give us internal peace.  We must let God be god of all.

I am sure you will find this book one that causes sore toes and a more contented heart.  So How’s Your Soul? If you’re not sure or if you want to ponder it a little deeper this is a good read for you.

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Review by Rayna: Doing Busy Better

 

Doing Busy Better has great content.

Though it would not make my top 10 list, I would recommend it because it does hit on some things which I think most of us need to hear.  The Lord definitely challenged me in areas as I read about this Better Busy.

Glyniss Whitwer is a self-proclaimed Type A Christian.  Even typing those words make me realize that most people don’t think that goes together very well.  Glyniss, like me, has felt bad for Martha, when she reprimanded for doing all the things that had to be done when Jesus visited. (my words)

In this book she discusses how busy is a part of who she is and most importantly who God made her to be.  But she doesn’t use it as an excuse for living in a way that causes neglect of the most important things in life. (as Martha did that day)

 

Glyniss states “God never meant for me to live non-stop.  God made work and rest in perfect symmetry.  We were created and commanded to work AND rest.”  Figuring out what that symmetry is the challenge and what she addresses in this book.

One area she addresses as a cause of harmful busyness is a wrong identity. 

When our identity is not found in Jesus we are often just one mistake away from going into overdrive to compensate.  Therefore that roller coaster of identity took her on a wild ride for years.

When pursuing your identity in the things you accomplish sets you up to HAVE to keep doing.  Even when you accomplish something great it is only a short a while before you have to get after the next project.

In contrast when you assign the source of your value and worth to God you will be freed from the fear of failure and opinions of others.  “The only thing that matters is what our heavenly father thinks about us and that is unchanging.”

Glyniss explores other reasons people stay busy for the wrong reasons and then moves on to what the right kind of busy is.  She explores physical rest and how some of our thoughts about being busy can affect our ability to rest.

From there she explores how physical rest leads us to Spiritual rest.

Glyniss states that Spiritual rest “happens when we stop striving.”  Stopping the striving allows us to find a deep sense of confidence.  Confidence that no matter what comes our way God is on the throne and He will not forget us.

Doing Busy Better goes on to: Explore ways to rest and the enemies of it. Presents how hurry is a heart conditions.  Lay out 5 questions to ask yourself to determine your core responsibilities, that helps us know what to stop to put an end to doing too much.  Also a challenge to implement a sabbath day and some of our mindsets that get in the way of this commanded practice.

Last I will leave you with one of my favorite quote,

“The abundant life Jesus offers is not abundant with work but with love.”


I would love to hear your thoughts on this book.  Be sure to leave your comments on my blog.

 

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Do You Think in Questions?

What are you wearing today?  Why?  When you got ready to get dressed this morning what caused you pick out what you have on today?

If you are anything like me most days I do a pretty good job of dressing myself considering what my day has in store for me.  I usually consider the weather, if I will be doing anything special and even what I wore last time I saw the people I will be seeing that day.

Do you think in questions?

I would have said no when I first heard that question and about Question Thinking by Marilee Adams but the more I think about it I realize I do, in a way.

When I stand before my closet a ton of questions come to mind.

What is the weather supposed to be like today?  HOT.

Do I want to wear pants or shorts?

What shorts are clean?

Will I be working in my office all day or do I have appointments? If I’m in my office the air-conditioning can cause me to be chilly at times something I don’t have to worry about if I am going to be running errands or going to an appointment.

What shoes do I want to wear?

Comfy or cute?

Will those shoes go with these shorts?

The questions go on and on.

So yes, I think in questions much more than I realized.  One reason I had not realized how often I think in questions is because I usually just hear the answers in my head not the questions.  Since I usually just hear the answers I thought was thinking in statements rather than question.  How about you?

Join me for the Think Question Change Workshop to learn more about how your internal questions impact your life.

Learn More


I would love for this to be a discuss. I want to know your thoughts on Questions.  Please share below.

Have you exercised for 30 minutes today?

We all know we need to exercise at least 30 minutes per day.  How do you think your questions about exercising effect your outcome?

Let me share an experience with you…..

Yesterday…..

3:00 pm, I asked myself do I feel like exercising today?  Not really.

Well I know I should. When can I fit it in the busy afternoon and evening I have planned?  There is no time.  I will do it tomorrow.

Today….

It’s 8 o’clock, time to exercise.  Do I want to do the elliptical, yoga or BodyGroove today?  Grooving gives me the most steps.

How many steps do I have today?  4,929 ok I better get busy.

Are these shoes the best choice today?  No

Where are my tennis shoes?  In the closet, off I go to get them on and get to it.

The first question I asked myself changed where my next question went.

That one question leads me to a place that let me skip exercising without a whole lot of thought. The second one lead to questions that helped me arrive at an answer that was best for me.

What questions are you asking yourself when it comes to exercise?

Stop and think about it today. 


I would love to hear what you have discovered about your questions and the results you are getting.

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